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Some people (Negros) say I have a big prick - well I do!  No one calls me Mar-a-lago slim.  My cock is thick and huge, one of the biggest pricks.  Why else would a porn star like Stormy allow me to Trump-root her silly? And, Melania - she can only handle my porno-prick half-way to the root and for 10 minutes.  If I'm not done, she slides me a couple $100's and tells me to pay Stormy to let me finish. 
Did you know, some people tell me, that Goat-Fucking requires slim, short rat-dicks.  I hear Iranians have evolved over millions of years to fuck goats.  Atlanta Slim, did you get that name fucking goats?

That orange prick is playing the weirdest fucken horn I've ever seen. He sure is an ugly looking freak. Can't imagine that sweet Melania banging him. She must be knocked out on valium or something when he does it.

When I see that shepherd I see a man content with his life. Resting on his balcony and staring out over Austria. Satisfied in knowing that his hard work and dedication will leave a lasting mark on the world. Blowing his pipe until his maid brings him his steamed brussel sprouts.
Yes, a man of his time, and of ours.

The peaceful shepherd rests after leading his herd to greener pastures. Y'know. The Ukraine, Donbass, and the Volga.

Gotta have a comfy couch though I reckon 

@The DonaldHaha Ricky. That is a good joke. The truth is that like in Afghanistan, the mighty Yank is getting his rather atrophied arse pummeled by the Iranians. 
Oh Ricky, how does it feel that you are getting beaten by Muslims? Again!

I had a Ford Falcon once. Well it was a Ford. OK fine but I am going for my license one day.

Howdy.  Maltese Falcon of the Rebels Motorcycle Club  giving ya a shout-out on this rip-snorter news outlet. We're just a group of restless riders tearing through Brisbane's outskirts at the moment. This Rikardovits bloke, a hang-around you know, reached out to us to become a patched member.  He gave Xenox News as a reference and told us to leave a comment and someone would vouch for him.  Seems like got some mickey-mouse political ambitions too. The Rebels could use someone like that.  
So, what say you - admit him or curb-stomp him?
The Maltese Falcon - 1%er for life.

Hay boy, I piss on 'ol Boxboy's head tar keep 'm cool, fiar-proof 'n smell'n like a Kanberra Kanker-sore Kowboy.  He tain't catch a flame yet!!!  'N you 'member, when it come a time tar vote.....
RIKKKARDOVITZ FER PRIME MINISTER 'O ALL AUSTRALIA!!!  (Jest rite in KKK, 'n I git ya covered, boy). 

HOW DARE YOU, Donald! Your criminal and offensive micro-aggressions aimed at those men, me in particular, who have anal-fannies, is unacceptable. And, yes, I may be a cock-gobbler, as you so crudely put it, but I am still the leader of the great nation of OZ! OZ is a place where government controls what Citizens say because they have no guns.  No testes either.  No ability to stop a cock-gobbler such as myself form allowing Wogs, Lebos, and other nefarious furry MusIims to grace our Australian shores, and rape our Australian women.  I never cared much for lady-vag anyway - a complete waste of time when a man could be getting arse-raped by swarthy goat-fuckers. 

Ladies Gentlemen, Commies and Poofters (people say that's Max Gross), Epic Furry is targeting the world's number one state sponsor of terror, Iran.

In these past eight weeks, our armed forces have delivered swift, decisive, overwhelming victories over the furry MusIims of Iran. These sick animals have fur on their backs, on their feet and in their twisted brains turning them into blood-thirsty monsters. On the battlefield we are winning biggly. Tonight, Iran's Navy is shaved. It's Air Force is buried under radioactive lye. The Gayatollah has had every hair surgically plucked from his brain, and we are harvesting his organs for research.

The IRGC is being hexidecimated as we speak - that's like a shit-ton of them! Their ability to masturbate on deadly missiles while watching gay porn is dramatically curtailed (some people said it couldn't be done) and their cock-gobblers, goat beautification factories and lady-boy launchers are being blown to pieces. This is what I call WINNING BIGGLY!

As long as you call it Crok I approve.

@All In On AIYeh, this AI shit is really taking off. Maybe time for Xenoxnews.com to whip up their own version. Whaddya reckon Tex?

Too busy talking to A.I. for any petty activities Don.

Any of you cunts going to the snow?

@Wandering PoetFark

@DonnyI can see that Don. The beer spluttering down the fissures and crevices of his noggin holder as Boxy sucks another can dry. 
And those blank eyes... glassy and wet. Gazing out of the blackness like death itself.
And so I too, raise a tinny to the BoxMan, with the hope that freedom for all doesn't just mean 6 feet underground.

If you done it right the box would be moist from beer splutter.

Looks like Boxy has even survived the flames of Brixton! Undoubtable proof that his 'slightly' moist box theory works.
But for our Frenchy friend I reckon he is gunna need a box of asbestos to ward off the fire at his place.

The flames of capitalism are gunna burn us all Boxy!

I got violent once. Really violent. I really gave it to them! Well it was after they left but still.

And the fuckers always, always, ALWAYS get away with it

@Fatima bint Mwhammed (aka RicI know you like these stories Mr Ricardovitz because it is so much like your daddy man President Trump. An idiot leader who can't keep his hands off little girls!

I PUT FATWA ON JEW GLOBALISTS - Andy Burnham, Mark Carney. Anthony Albanese.  And, on Communists too.  LALALALALALLALA ALALALALALALALALA.  Fatwa on Max Gross a Jew and a Communist - double Fatwa LALALALAL ALALALALALALALALALA. 
I create Fatwa in AIIah's name when Daddy's dirty cunt-wife, Asisha forsake him.  Called Daddy a rapist, a pedophile and tell him NO MORE NUK-NUK.  Well, I offer my sweet flower to Daddy at age 10 and Daddy love me and praise AIIah. Now, for Daddy, I become Fatwa Queen.  ALALALALALLALALL LALALALALLALAALA. 

@AnonymousAgree.

Shit must be going bad if old Condie Rice is being called up to pump President Dickhead's Iran war.

I reckon thar nefarious Negros 'round here think I cuda had somethin tar do wid hack'n this Fair Dimkun newzpaper.  Well, 'ol Ricky dern't roll like dat, see.  Nosiree, dat thar be TERRORISM not  REPORT'NISM.  
Now, I be see'n a swarthy southerner "Profit Motive" rant'n 'n gallivant'n tar da Xenox public.  He tain't no good.  He A bad dude, fer sure. Now, I git a right mind tar report Mr Motive tar the Aussie Authorities, cept fer they tain't but a bunch 'o sopp'n wet pussies. 
Anywhoo, y'all 'lect me Prime Minister 'o Australia 'n I promise tar stop Mr Motive 'n all his neferious, swarthy sand-jiggers from hack'n Fair Dimkun newzpapers like dis here one!!!

When I die I am leaving my brain to A.I. I hope that this will be helpful. You know to humanity and everything.

I got hacked once. Well it wasn't really a hack. Someone slept in my car and then stole all of my tapes. I definitely lost a box of cassettes. Well I might be imaging that there was a box. Before computers hacking meant a different thing I think. Unless it is the same? I really did have a car though.

@Von Mises19 years ago it was a 'crippling debt' and now? You num-num libertarians and your idiocy deserve the Gulag!

Ok. Lets try that again...

Finally we are hitting Iran where it hurts. Their schools, water supply, and bridges. Thank God we have a man's man as President. All hail little hands Trump!

I am fairly sure that if you use your left hand it should fine.

I love me a Pirate Boy. Hair green, red, or black, I don't mind. As long as his lips are around the old fella, everything is fine 😍

Well I'll be. We are back!

How dare you insult our great PM you dim witted hillbilly Ricadovitz!
Your Orange Small Handed President Trump isn't fit to wipe our PM Squeaky Albo's arse!

I've been living on the Dole since my mum was a young tart and I was just a young lad. PLEASE keep me as Australia's Prime Minister - I don't know any other way of life other than living off of the tax payer's money.

My mum got knocked up by a drunkard, and I popped out of her cunt 9 months later. She was already on the Dole and taught me how to take "free stuff" from the government at an early age. I've been bilking the Australian people to pay may way in life and my mummy tells me I've done a fine job.

That meanie, Peter Dutton called me a faggot, a poofter, a turd-burglar and a cock-gobbler. Well, I won't confirm or deny any of that, (but, I do love a stiff communist cock in my rectum), and he can't prove it. Besides, I'm married now. To some tart who happens to have one of those weird front-fannies. Its squishy and icky - I don't like it. And, she's missing.... something.

I'm hoping that you fine blokes at Xenox News can help me out. I'm sick and tired of people calling me a POOFTER! I'm very afraid that some foreigner could come to OZ (we named our dog Toto, isn't that cute), and take my good-paying prime minister job away from me. For the first time in my life, I could be off the Dole and have to find work. My wife told me I could be a house-whore for older men, and that doesn't sound too bad to me. But, then nasty-Peter would call me vile, ugly names all over again. I can't have that (pardon me, I'm ggggetting a lllllittle teary-eyed)!

Hillbilly Bitches, Let Us Pray:

Awar rahmani rahim
Azazil lillahi rabbil alamin
Ar-rahmanir rahim
DajjalMaliki yaumi din
Iyaka na’budu wa iyaka
WA WA WA WA WA WA
Die Juden
Hanikak Aisha....Hanikak Aisha
Alalalalala Akakakar Dumah
Ameen

Ted Bundy? Teddy Kennedy? is that you? I remember you wanting to date my precious little Ashley - couldn't keep your scurvied paws off of her. But, Ashley only had eyes for her fuzzy pet snake, if you know what I mean, Ted.

Seems like someone told me you were serial killing girls up in the frat house at Chappaquiddick. I know, not like we all didn't do that in your younger days, but Ted I never got caught. I took up for you, Ted, cuz I know you're a stand-up guy, and you'd do the same for me.

Jill wanted to say "Hi Ted", but she's busy taking care of my boy, Hunter right now - I hear her screaming at him, she's almost done. But, then, I have a real pooey mess for her to clean up next. Always good talking to my old buddy Ted.

What I like about this cartoon is that he picked Woody Allen before anyone else.

@Joe BidenJoe didn't you also do this stuff with the Orangeman in the Whitehouse? He sure is starting to act like you now, what with him wandering around in a daze and mumbling inanities half the time. Seems like you really are the best of pals in reality.

A little girl, just like that one, gave me an ice-cream a long time ago for my 70-something birthday. She hid sharp little razor blades all in. My momma always taught me to eat ice-cream with my back-pussy, which is what I commenced to do.

That ice-cream gave me the bloodiest hemorrhoids in the history of Delaware! Dr. Jill had to stitch up my back-pussy. She must have gotten a little too carried away, because I couldn't shit for a month. For real man, I went a whole month having to puke poo out of my pie-hole. I tried to sue Jill for malpractice only to find out she wasn't a real doctor......anyway, that's how we beat medicare.

Hay boy, I done give y'all a hunnered chances tar VOTE FER RICARDOVITZ prime minister 'o Aussieland. I pleged 'a give y'all yer guns back so's ya werntant never be 'holdin tar crooked politicians never 'gain. Give y'all FREEDOME 'O SPEECH. Real Freedom. Southern-style Freedom. 'N ship off all them nefarious wogs, lebos, muslims, abos, 'n slant-eyeds back tar the jungles they done come from.

But, no, y'all vote for slop-a-cock Ken. King 'o the sopp'in wet vaginars. Now, ya git stank kooter all up in yer feather bonnets 'n tween yer toes. 'N no FREEDOM tar show fer it!!!

@Ricardovitz[img]https://www.xenoxnews.com/images/phocagallery/giants_5/thumbs/phoca_thumb_l_screenshot_20260708_084307_chrome.jpg
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@RicardovitzWe could just ask old President 'littlehands' Trump what he uses. Seeing he has the experience.

Whatcha look'n fer, boy? Skkkittles? Kkkandy? Kkkake? Boolits? Boolit-banger? How 'bout a ripe young negress???

Is this what they call the dark web?

I scream you scream we all scream

What happened to Penn? Shouldn't he be leading the charge to save Ukraine? Or was that just a contract he got from Joe?

Oh Mr Ricardovitz is that old girlfriend of yours in the picture the one with glasses? Why you dirty little queen!