Our man Boxy has been a busy boy lately. Seems like all the World's Great & Good want to bother him for his Pearls of Wisdom! But today we have something from some twerp called Peter Dutton...

Dear Mr Head (or may I call you Box?),
There seems to be an agitated brawl over the naming of potato cakes in in our wide brown land. Cakes? Scallops? Fritters? And where does it leave the chips? Or are they fries?
Honestly, it's does my skull in. Especially when I consider myself Australia's Prime Potato and wannabe PM. What is the appropriate nomenclature for that fella???

Please, Mr Head (Box?), elucidate and grant me a restful night's sleep.

Yours Sincerely,

Peter Dutton

Dear Peter,

No you cunt. You may not call me Box.

You know it is true. Ever since I first laid eyes on you I thought you looked like a spud. One big fucking ugly potato. And you were a Cop in your past life as well. Constable Potato Cunt I bet your name was.

You would think as wanna be PM you would have something more important on your mind. But I suppose as your head is an ugly potato your brain is just a lump of starch and so there is not much going through it. I tell you Petey boy I don't know and don't care about your potato delicacy naming issues. I just wish you would fuck off and disappear up the arse of Barnaby and then the both of you go and drown in the Coral Sea.

Hearing from you reminds of when another group of Box wearing heroes had to deal with Spudboys like you...

Now, get the fuck out of here and go crawl up Barnaby's arse like I told you.

Kind regards,

Boxhead