"Trans Women are not monsters. They are just people who like to wear women's clothing, wear makeup, special accessories and look pretty. What's wrong with that?"
Resident rightwing nutjob Ricardovitz sat down with our emotions correspondent Marvina McTillers, and had a surprising heart to heart about his sexuality, and his feelings for good leather.
Let's hear from Marvina about her interview:
"Just last week I spent a lovely afternoon high up in the Clayton Hills of Georgia with Mr Ricardovitz. Here in his log cabin, over tea and biscuits, Ricky, as he is known to some, started by asking 'why should we allow dead body parts go to waste?' He told me that he was fascinated by large female nipples, Trans philosophy, and all things freedom.'
‘Do you want to see my sewing collection Marvina?’
We asked the new Rickina to shave but he wouldn't do it.
I was amazed. In his wardrobe, this hillbilly fuckwit had belts of nipples, a leather mask with 4 noses, stitched in a very ‘Germanesque pattern’, and some genuine vulva-panties.
‘I got them for when I want to attend the local Drag Queen Story Hour’
‘You know Marvina, I would love kids to be able to see people who defy rigid gender restrictions and imagine a world where everyone can be their authentic selves.’
‘But angry parents’, explained the incest loving Ricky, 'can be problematic.'
He went on to tell me ‘I want to fuse the righteous anger of a sexually repressed white male in Clayton, Georgia and the sweet femininity of a Darlinghurst Queen’
In fact, that dim witted hillbilly hick said that in the end all he really wanted to be was his sister. ‘So I could fell how it feels to be fucked by me’
Is this the new Ricky?
With that I shut the door and left. A typical example of American men Ricky may be, but he is also truly a fuckwit!”
The new flag of Gender Ambivalent Ricardovitz Land. As told to Marvina.