A queue is forming outside The Lodge in Canberra. And it is starting to get impatient. These guys have waited 6 years for this and they don’t want to wait any longer...
Controlling the unruly mob outside PM Abbott's new abode: The Lodge, Canberra.
Who are they?
Well they are rich and the powerful, the pious and the pitiful, and just the plain old fucking stupid. They are the ones who backed new PM Tony Abbott to the hilt when he was opposition leader and now it's payback time. And Tony should be ready to payback big because these people don’t like to hear no as an answer!
The list includes:
The Catholic Church
Archbisop Pell is front of the line and he wants more money for mick schools and a ban on abortion. Rosary clutching dimwit Abbott will get a pounding at the pulpit and a bollocking in the confessional if he doesn’t give in to Pell’s demands.
The Coal Miners
With fat boy Palmer’s stormtroopers in the Senate, Tony will have to lend his ear to these greedy bastards. They want no carbon tax, no action on climate change, more mining, and a free run through the Great Barrier Reef. Basically all things which the thickheads in the Fiberal party already agree with.
The Institute for Pubic Affairs
This mob have had their tongue up Abbott’s arse for so long they are brushing his teeth from the inside. Now it will be Tony’s turn to repay the favour. Their demands are simple: “Privatise!" And, "Free the crotch!”
Australia's Spying/Intelligence Community
The secret leaks Abbott received during his time in opposition don't come for free. The spooks want more power and less transparency and Tony is the man to give it to them.
John Howard
Waiting for the call to become the new Governor-General.
So it looks like new PM Abbott is going to have a busy first few weeks in office.
As for the rest of us; wait your turn suckers. Do you really think that Abbott will have any time to be Governing for you?