John Howard PM: E-ConMan

Transcript and turdscrape.
Urgent appeal to the Oz public.
John Howard PM: Economic Manager.


My, fellow, err, other Australians. As you know
already, my regime - so ably led by myself, has
delivered prosperity to everyone (except the
losers and we don't wish to speak of them).

Now look, there are some people talking about
something named "WorkChoices", I've never heard
the word before, I'm about the wonderful new
"TurdChoices" worker prosperity scheme from the
same people who brought you Iraqistan pride, GST,
and Centrelink humanitarian bludger bashing.
By the way, we have the cool NWO Biometric ID Card
ready, and it is actually NOT an ID Card!

Now let me get down to business. Here is a free
lesson in English diction. Now repeat these
words one hundred times:

"John Howard is a good economic manager,
nobody else can be as good as John Howard."

Now at first you will typically start to gag
and heave, and it is a not a good idea to eat
breakfast before this exercise. However, if you
persist, it gets easier and easier.
Eventually you will be able to listen to other
negative messages, such as these:

"Oz household debt over a trillion dollars",
"Oz foreign debt approaching a trillion dollars",
"Balance of trade negative for five years",
"True inflation rises through the roof".

And you will hear nothing except the mantra:
"John Howard good national economic manager."

I cannot tell you just how much help that will be
in my bid to slither back into office. Things are
getting a bit tight and I have plans to do an
expensive renovation of the Kirribilli House
vintage wine cellar!




http://www.101usesforajohnhoward.com/
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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    it's so great to see the recent polls showing Krudd going further and further ahead. i've got the sparkling on ice! soon we will be rid of this vile fascist dictatorship forever.
    DEATH TO THE LIBERALS
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    Hey Leftie you and your mob are going to have egg all over face come election time.

    There is no way mainstream Australia will entrust it's future to a bunch of union dominated yes men like Kruddy and his crew. You forget they are facing a man who stared down the Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein, squaring off against a light weight like Krudd will be a doddle for Australia's smartest politician. Especially as comes election time the mums and dad will start to remember what it was like when the ALP was last in power:
    -15% Interest rates
    -1000000 unemployed.

    Digger,

    Cranbourne
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    The king is dead, long live the king

    or

    out of the frying pan, into the fire

    or

    we are fucked
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    But at least Johnny will be dead. Amen.
    - Ex Liberal Voter
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    We are facing the possible re-election of the most frightening Prime Minister Australia has ever known.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    I recon I can do a better job than that lame duck you call John Howard.

    If'n I work hard enough at it, I can even git me to a talking just like one of you slick-tounged australians too. I watch lots of Steve Irwin re-runs, been practicing my Australian slick-tounged accent.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    If you promise to give our guns back Ricky you might do well.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    If elected Prime Minister of Australia, I would divert all funding for programs that assist non-national Australians and Unproductives for the production of new arms and importation of quality arms providing everyone who actually turned in firearms with comparable or better firearms at no charge.

    I would lead the charge to Australia having not the equivilant of American's 2nd Amendment, but a Constitutional provision with an undeniable guaranty that every legal Australian citizen would be entitled to own any type of firearm that the military or police of any Anglo nation posess or use, including handguns, machine guns, high powered rifles, gredande launchers, shotguns, Destructive Devices, swords, knives, switchblades, ballistic knives, and ammunition for all of the above.

    I promise to make and keep Australia free and independant nation.

    I promise to hault all illegal immigration; and curtail legal immigration.

    You need an honest person like me, a person who has holds productive Citizens' genuine interests sacred to the Nation, to be your leader. Even if for a short term; even if that leader cannot survive the political institutionalizm that may destroy him in a few short years. You need THAT kind of leader. Because THAT kind of leader, whether he survives politically or not, will embolden your people and open the door to the next leader to take those same policies that much further.

    Basically, you need a pit-bull to jump start you back to freedom and independance.

  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    Piss off Yank
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    I most certainly am not a "Yank", or "Yankee". I am a Confederate, a most bitter enemy of the Yanks.

    We are on the same side, Norm, in this war against Yankee Aggression. You and me, side by side, battling the tyrany and oppression thrust upon us by the DemoSocialist Yankees and the Liberal Australians.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 19 years ago
    If only Dumericans stuck to killing each other (as in the Civil War and each day in school campuses and McDonald's pig troughs across the country) then the world would be less of a mess.
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