Pirate wanted: Only Hardened, Horned and Happy Need Apply

OK, I've been on this bender for a few days...

It's hard to Party with Tina sometimes!

And now what I want is a Pirate Boy, dressed like an Errol Flynn. Bendable and fuckable.

A lad who knows what he wants. And what I want.

"Go and climb up the rigging Jim," that's what I'll say, "So I can stare at your shit stained arse."

Life on the high seas fucking stoned out of our tiny minds.

Is there a boy out there for me?

Someone to share the peace pipe and then eat my white jam?

I often stare at the night sky dreaming of the good life I could have had. If only I had stayed at High School. If only I hadn't got caught plugging my Woodwork teacher's arse. If only the Good Lord would have intervened...

I see the stars burning bright; pinpricks of tiny holes into the ether. Many magical colours I see.

And then it comes back to me...I want a Pirate Boy.

Only Hardened, Horned, and Happy need apply.

Someone like this:

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