In these times of trouble...

...Frank told me to reach for my Faith!

2020 chicken 

 So I Built me a Church of Chickens.

 

Chickens Chickens Chickens

Chicken Church

  

Squawking mother fucking chickens.

 

I heard that 40 years ago they fluttered down with eyes wide open like a wide open shutter. What a collection of fucking heroes. They were smoking cigars and chatting. Tripping the light fantatsic with Mr Frank Blues.

They told Frank all he needed to know.

And then, later, there was his son Theo. Tied to the microphone and squawking out the tequila mescal blues of the The Church of the Chicken a la Peyote.

Chicken Church 2

He had a message. A message that resonates even today.

 

Get your hand off your genitalia and start praying motherfuckers!

 

religious figures 14 20140424 1879668872

In these times of trouble I always remember...

 

GOD said it. I believe it. THAT settles it.

 religious figures 18 20140424 1631854897

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I like this one. Look it is blind but still spluttering out its tune. Like the rest of us. Why not pray to it? Fucking on the ball, a feathered fuckwit that floated down in my mescaline dreamtime. Smoking cigars and cracking cicada shells.

Just erase that fucking cross of it. Sometimes my followers got confused. As if that cunt Jesus offered anything but limp dicked persecution and ignorance. Fill it all in with feathers and stuffing. And we will float to the Heaven on High.

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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    I tell you who I'd like to "Squawk", that fat cunt Bannon. Turn his red arse blue with my manifesto of love.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    I don't know what this claptrap is about, but I bet you the CCP has had a hand in the turmoil in Washington DC today. Pumping out misinformation and having agent provocateurs inciting riots is a trademark of the communists. President Biden needs to be installed quickly, and after this unrest is quelled he must confront Beijing about their lies and violence.

    Maybe some action in the Taiwan Staright would send a message.

    God bless,
    Patriot
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    "In these times of trouble"

    I thought it was Mother Mary not some fucking chicken?

    Have I been wrong all this time?
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    Some revolution. The pathetic proud boys had to get Antifa to bust into the house. Next...
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    @Billy Bob Antifa? You numb numbs really are as weak as piss. If you do the shit own it at least.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    Welcome To Thar Ricardovitz Plantation... Rise 'n Shine, boys, y'all git go'in.  Chickletts, you is clean'n out the hogs pen - here's yer shovel, now git!  Moonface - put on these here stomp'n boots, cuz you is stomp'n 'n spread'n all them fresh cow paddies.  Methmouth, I need you to run this here barbed wire down ware some foreigners git killed mess'n 'round the south end, near rabbit rock - take Chi-boy with ya.   Eyecue, you is gonna run a team of "complainers" to pull weeds in the north cabbage field 'n 'round this here greenhouse. Shaniqua, you take Mammie 'n fix up vittles fer thar work'n folk - have everthang down at the mess hall by quitt'n time.  Rayray, Jontuq 'n Fritter, y'all done good work last few days, I want you ta ferry up stream of Hardwick's plot after dark 'n catch a heap of them stocked trout from that thar gooberment pond 'n put em all in Camp Lake. Till then, clean out all that muck from the lake 'n put it in Moonface's shit-bag fer spread'n.

    Thar 'll be food 'n money wait'n fer y'all at the mess hall when you finish.  Any questions.....Any complaints......GOOD!  Now, git to it!!!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    @Ricardovitz Oh that is very generous of you to pay these people Mr Ricardovitz. Not something I would ever do on my farm.

    But we do encourage singing!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    Well, Maggie, you dern't know nothin! Likely you ain't never run no company store.  Probaly dern't have no happy rocks er shine fer a fair price neither.  This here is thar 2020's.  You gotta pay yer folks sumpthin so's they can pay yer store clerk fer thar toiletries 'n whatnot.  Tain't like these here folks is gonna hike 30 miles outa hear fer ta git a 6-pack of schlitz 'n a box of smokes.   Whipp'n folks is what we call "barbarick" - somethin my daddy 'n his daddy had to do.  Once a worker checks in at my Plantation, he tain't got no reason ta leave. I treat 'em right good.  'N they work right hard fer me so's I kin reward 'em with a ration of shine 'n I start 'em all out on a Quarter-rock fer nothin!  Anythang they want more 'n a quarter-rock 'n a half-pint of shine, folks can git at the company store.  If'n some 'ol boy dern't want ta work - well, hell, take thar day off!  Ain't gonna be make'n no trip ta the company store that day, though.  Nosirree!!!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 5 years ago
    My head is looking like that bald bird. I blame the following (in no particular order):
    1. God
    2. My mother
    3. Mr Cohen
    4. The Horn. Oh! Won't it ever go away!
    5. The Australian education system.
    6. Anarchists
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Let me start off with two words:

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